English Wife, Indian Life

English Wife, Indian Life

The Diary of Lauren Mokasdar

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Tag: generalised anxiety disorder

Diwali flower rangoli!
May 3, 2017August 20, 2019 Lauren (English Wife, Indian Life)

How I Learnt to Live Now!

Light at the end of the tunnel
November 29, 2013 Lauren (English Wife, Indian Life)

Depression & Anxiety

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Yesterday we went blackberry picking with my grandparents. I'm very lucky to have a lovely footpath with hundreds of blackberry bushes on my doorstep. My 91 year old nanny hasn't been very well lately, and she walked the furthest she has in months! "Some of my happiest memories are picking blackberries, and I thought I would never do it again". ❤
Happy Independence Day, India! ❤ I'm missing seeing the school children's parade and all the flags! Post photos! #throwback
Sonshine's Sunflowers 🌻❤
😱Why did we leave India?😱 This is quite hard to write... It was 45oC+ and my little boy was at the door screaming, again, desperate to go out for a walk, but we couldn't. Often when it was cool enough to go out for a walk, kids would follow us, point at him, laugh, calling him "foreigner baby". Before becoming a mother, I didn't mind being a loner and considered the outsider (even if it was frustrating at times). I was able to observe, learn and write. I became a mother and becoming a mother in itself can be isolating and now I didn't want to be an outsider anymore. I didn't want my child to be the pointed at. I didn't want to keep having holidays in England while my husband had to stay in India due to his work. It was a really hard decision which involved our son (18 months at the time) and I having to return to England without my husband, for me to work long hours for 6 months before we could apply for my husband's visa and a further 3 months before he was able to join us in England. My husband quickly got a great job in the field he loves and was able to adapt to England much better than I could in India. I do miss India, family (including alfonso) and some special places. We aim to visit at least once a year and have our Indian family visit us as much as possible. The 4 years I lived in India made me stronger and wiser and I don't have any regrets. It's hard to live between two countries. It was a hard decision to move to England, but we must adapt to new situations... and here we are :). P.S. Alfonso the pug is being thoroughly pampered by my in-laws.
Sending flowery vibes of thanks to all my followers who continued to follow me during the last 2 years of very sparse communication❤ I really do appreciate those check in messages and words of encouragment I have received, thank you so much! ❤ I've had to take time not only to achieve some goals (we have started a new life in England), I've needed time to return to the mindset where words of kindness are more impactful than spiteful criticism, and teaching has helped me deal with that. As a teacher I have had to develop the ability be reflective while really holding onto wins and simultaneously treating every lesson as a fresh start. Learning from bumps in the road whilst letting them roll off my back, attempting not to take things personally. Phew! No need to wait for January 1st or a new moon for a fresh start ❤. A big thank you to you all and yay to another fresh start 😊
We moved into our first home a couple of weeks ago! 7am that morning, both sides of our family came for our griha pravesh (house warming) pooja, our family in Nagpur and the priest via video call. How amazing that an ancient ritual can be performed with the help of modern technology!! The transition from India to England has been long, busy, emotional and transformative, but everything is falling into place. Have a lovely weekend 🌷

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