Goodbye India, Hello England! 71


It’s been an emotional year, in so many ways! I would like to say a huge thank you to everyone who has followed my blog and sent me messages of support, I cannot find the words to express my gratitude! Thank you! I couldn’t call this year easy, living in India as a foreigner takes a lot of getting used to, but it’s been worth it because I was with the man I love. As I wait to leave India for six weeks, I feel an overwhelming spectrum of emotions.

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I am a sensitive person on a regular day, so today my emotions are on uberhypersuperdrive. I feel sad to leave my husband and Alfonso, excited to see my family and friends, I am dreading the journey itself, I am anxious about a multitude of things and I am happy that I have lived here a year, proved people wrong and not given up.

I have numbed to the culture shocks and I don’t get as angry when I’m followed by strangers because of the colour of my skin. I have found precious strength in faith, I have discovered a certain degree of understand but the living in a joint family and therefore being unable to have personal space and control over my life has made me weak. India is known as the land of contrasts, I can certainly agree with that! 

So as I sadly leave my love behind in India for six weeks and miserably attempt to hold back my tears, I am so happy that I will soon be reunited with the other loves of my life, my family and friends (and decent cheese sandwiches).

You’ll hear from me, from England!

Lots of love, Lauren x


About Lauren Mokasdar

Lauren fell in love on the internet, took a one way flight from England, got married & started a new life & bicultural family in India. She writes about finding happiness & balance between two very different worlds, when her baby takes a nap.


71 thoughts on “Goodbye India, Hello England!

  • Cindy

    Enjoy being “home” for a while and take in all that you can so you have enough stored up for another year or so. It blows me away to see people switch to living in another region. Although I want to visit many places, I couldn’t stay long. So have fun, strong one, everyone needs “home” once in a while. ♡

  • kreacherspeaks

    You must be really looking forward to this vacation! Hope you have a lovely time 🙂 Living in a joint family is not something that is taken to too kindly by many Indian girls themselves, so I believe you are doing an amazing thing for your relationship. Take care..

    • ML

      I am an Indian Maharashtrian girl, and was very firm about not wanting to live in a joint family in India after marriage – and that was in no small measure, due to having experienced the negative side of a joint family set up in my childhood and teen years. Fought many battles with my parents about this, finally left home, found a job in the US, found my own life partner, got married and have settled down here.
      So Lauren, your grace and patience in living in an Indian joint family set up on top of the other challenges that a foreigner might face living in India is a feat by itself. Am happy to know that you and your husband intend to move to a home of your own in the near future. Things will definitely be much more better after that.
      Wish you safe and pleasant travels to England and a lovely time with family.
      Best regards to you and your husband.

      • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

        Hey ML,
        Lovely to hear from you. I am so glad you stood up for yourself and have found someone special to spend you life with, beautiful! I hope you are both very happy in the US. I thought that living in a joint family wouldn’t be so bad (not have the experience you had), but with time it became extremely difficult and the only choice is to move out, it’s a shame but it’s the only way.

        Thank you so much for your kind words, best of luck to you and your partner!!

        Take care xxx

      • kreacherspeaks

        Well, when you move into your own home, you will face a different set of challenges but having your own space is really amazing and you will find your relationship with your husband being redefined just like you both want it to. Wish you and your famly a great holiday season!

        • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

          Hey Honey Bee,
          Yes, I am ready for the new challenges, I really need it! I feel like I will be able to be able to grow and make build a life for myself in India with the freedom!
          I hope you are well!
          Merry Christmas xx

  • Amanda McMahon

    Enjoy your stay back home. Breathe in the cold air, eat those good cheese sandwiches… and find a new appreciation for someething in India. All the best from the Mumbai metro area 🙂

  • Siva

    I thought that you’re busy with your book writing.

    Have a safe journey and enjoy it. Convey my regards to your family also 🙂

  • Anil Kumar

    Lauren, nice to know that you are going back to England for holidays. I think you have enlightened many youngsters about marriages between 2 nationals.
    Hope you had good memories in India.
    Such successful marriages will bring nations closer and peace in the decades to come.
    Have safe journey to and fro.
    Take Care

  • Debbie Downing

    Hi Lauren,
    It would be lovely to meet you in person for a tea or coffee when you get back here. I am walking distance from your mum’s house – I am SURE you are going to be very busy though. Funnily enough my son’s topic for this term is…..India! He is 12 but has Special Needs though and goes to a Special School nearby – if you would like to, perhaps you could go into school with me one day to talk the class about India??? They haven’t asked but it might be a bonus for them and interesting for you? A Turkish friend of mine went in once and they all had great fun learning ‘hello’, goodbye’ and ‘thank you’ in Turkish. School term finished this year on Friday 19th and I have no idea when you are back.
    Please don’t feel obliged – I tend to throw ideas out there whenever they come into my busy head………!! Debbie
    Safe journey. dx

    • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

      Hey Debbie!!
      Would love to meet and speak to your son’s class!! I will email you and so we can sort out something! I am not sure when they break up for the Christmas holidays but I will be here until the 15th of Jan 😀

      I have brought a saree with me so it would be fab!

      I hope you are well!! Lots of love
      Speak soon xx

  • Anshuman Mishra

    I hope you enjoy time with your family and tell tales about your life here. You do deserve a break from your current routine because India definitely has been tough on you due to cultural differences and way of living. I take exception of your statement that lack of few things have made you week, in fact you should feel like conceding defeat momentarily to make a strong come back later in a positive sense and overwhelm everyone.

    Happy journey!

  • Jocelyn - Speaking of China

    Lauren, I can totally understand how you must feel about this trip. I remember the first time I traveled by myself back to the States to see my family and all of the emotions I had about the journey. But it’s going to be fantastic for you to spend the holidays with your family. I wish I was able to get back to the US for Christmas this year but, unfortunately, it’s not possible. Be sure to live it up and give us lots of updates on your life!

    • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

      Hey Jocelyn,
      Lovely to hear from you! It has been an emotional ride! I hope you have a lovely Christmas in China, I am sure you can pull some of the Christmas spirit East 🙂
      I hope you are both well xx

  • Satyam

    Take care Lauren!! I hope you really enjoy your holidays with your family and get to unwind a bit away from the huge melting pot called India 😀

  • wisemonkeysabroad

    Wow!! Has it been a year already?! You have achieved so much in this year and you should be fist-pumping the air 🙂

    We send you plenty of strength so that the next 6 weeks are easy on you. It certainly will be tough without your beloved but at least you are with your family and friends.

    It will be interesting to see how you feel being back in a England – reverse culture shock??

    Big hugs coming your way!

    • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

      The year has flown hasn’t it!! I cannot believe it!!
      Thank you so much for your kind words guys 😀 I really appreciate it!

      I have settled in quite well, I thought I would have more culture shocks but its just like going back in time!! Strange!

      I hope you guys are well! Take care and Merry Christmas xx

  • Roshni

    Have a wonderful time in your birth country with lots of love from your family and friends, lots of familiar foods to eat, and places to revisit and reconnect with!

    • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

      Thank you so much, Roshni!
      Yes, I am very lucky I get to see my lovely friends and family after such a long time (and eat LOADS of food :D)
      I hope you are well xx

  • Subramanian

    Goodness lauren
    Almost thought you are leaving us for good…glad to know you will be back.
    Do come back

    • surya

      printing your post is a slap on your face man…understand that current generation of British are not responsible for what their ancestors have done.

      Well now, you do have a great time in good old England Lauren. I lived there during the first half of 90s. Have only good memories from that era.The nostalgia overpowers me now. Used to enjoy driving from one end to the other and feel good about it : ), I must say I dont miss the winters though.

      • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

        Thank you so much, Surya.
        I am having a lovely time, surprisingly it isn’t as cold as usual! Quite mild, nothing like India though!

        I hope you are well and Merry Christmas 😀

        Lauren

  • Abhishek

    Hope you will have a great time in England dear Lauren. You are a gem of a person and good people will always support you. Dont worry and listen to the trolls 🙂

  • Kripa

    Hi Lauren,

    I came across your page recently and I love your posts. I’m a South Indian Brahmin , born and brought up in Tamil Nadu. Love and marriage has brought me here to the US ( Chicago) . I remember my first India trip after my wedding. It was so wonderful to see my family again!! 🙂 I’m sure you should be having a grand time in England with your loved ones.

    So how is your married life ? Do you love living in India ? I was brought up in a big joint extended family system and I’ve seen my mother make innumerable sacrifices and adjustments all through her life. Her love for my dad kept her going. 🙂

    So, are you enjoying your time in England ?

    Hugs and kisses to Alfonso.. 🙂

    Regards,
    Kripa.

    • Lauren Mokasdar Post author

      Hey Kripa,

      Lovely to hear from you!! I had a lovely time in England, thank you! I was really sad to leave but really needed to see my husband and Alfonso after such a long time!

      I really love living in India and will love it more when I get my own space and we can move out of joint family life, sadly it’s not for us. Your mum must be really strong!

      I hope you are well and having a lovely day in Chicago!

      Lots of loveee xx

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